Trying to Calm Down

[CORINNE MAYES]

Starr looked around at the garden. She sighed. Why was she here again? Was this not an insane asylum. All she did was beat the shit out of that guy. "Which he deserved, I might add." She said quietly to herself. Starr wasn't sure if she wanted any company, but she was out here might as well not die from boredom anytime soon. There was nobody else in the gardens and there were benches placed randomly. Starr decided that she could sit on one and get a little sun. She wasn't crazy, yet why was she here? She really didn't remember much from the past few days, but all she knew was that she was here now. That her parents had made sure she was getting "the best treatment available". But didn't they always say that when they were just sending you away because they couldn't handle you?

Starr looked around, the garden was quite pretty. But, then again she knew this place was going to get old. She had nearly killed that guy because he wanted to call her a name. She had really flown off the handle. But he deserved it, she had a feeling that if nobody had pulled her off or even waited an instant longer that she would have killed him. Starr did throw a brick at his head. She smiled as she remembered the adrenaline rushing through her veins as she chucked it at his head. It had made quite the sound when it connected and he had dropped instantly. She couldn't help but smiling at the fact that she had taken him. She was stronger than anyone had even thought. How great a feeling was that? "It is the best feeling in the world." She said to herself.

She knew she would never see that feeling again. That was just too perfect. Someone getting what they deserved for once. She was the one to deliver. "Yeah, may have been the best thing ever. But look where it got me? I am stuck here for who knows how long now. What a joke. What do they even expect to accomplish here anyway?" She said looking around the garden once more. She had seen a few workers here and there but had definitely kept her distance from them. She had heard the horror stories in movies and crap. She wasn't going to let any of that happen to her. She didn't feel like she was even supposed to be here. All she did was assault the asshole. Well, almost killed him. But she couldn't stop. She still didn't understand how she had flown off the handle so easily. It wasn't like it was that insulting anyway. She had heard it a hundred times before. But when this guy uttered those words, she flipped. She couldn't ever go back to that school, oh she knew that. "Not that I would ever want to even set foor in that hell-hole anyway." She said. It was true, she really didn't care if she couldn't go back there ever again. She would live. She would survive.

[GWENYTH"ECHO"WHITE]

Gwen skipped outside smiling. It was sunny out today. Her eyes sparkled in the light and she bounded outside unsupervised. No one worried much about her. She didn't have anything that would cause her trouble, not really, she was never a threat. More often than not, she'd be the receiving end of a stronger minded/willed/violent patient. A few nurses sent her little smile which she returned, copying their little waves, as she skipped towards the garden.

She frowned when she saw no flowers were growing, not really. Was it too cold? Or was their just not enough happiness here to cultivate a little color? Gwen dropped down on the hard ground, picking up old dried leaves. She ripped the edges so they were circles at best, and stuck them onto sticks in the ground. Gwen had decided to make her own flowers.

And so she went on this way for quite some time, moving around happily. She didn't come across any other people for what felt like a very long time. And when she did, the girl didn't notice her. Gwen cocked her head to the side and observed for a moment. Then, dropping her handful of leaves, she sat on the other end of the bench, crossing her leg over the other, resting her hands and turning her face into a disgruntled scowl, copying the dark haired girl.

"Hello," She said brightly, shifting her stolen position only slightly in order to grin. "I'm Gwen." She really should have been smart enough to realize the girl didn't look like she wanted company, but Gwen's desire for friends was greater than anything else. She didn't relaly have anyone, no one but whoever she could find within these walls.

[CORINNE MAYES]

Starr watched as a happy girl came out into the garden. She seemed way to happy to be in an institution. Or anything other than a cheerleading team. She grimaced as the girl kept coming closer and closer to her. Would she make conversation? What would happen. Starr didn't usually like making friends that skipped around the garden. But what the hell. She was bored and maybe if they saw her acting like she liked someone, they wouldn't think she was out to kill everyone in the world in some mass murder. Starr couldn't help but sigh. This was going to suck.

As the girl sat next to her, Starr noticed that she sat in almost the exact same position as her. Even the scowl, well that was until she smiled and introduced herself. Starr was starting to think this was a stupid idea. She had noticed the nurses wave at her on her way out. How did they treat her so well? Starr got frowns and scowls when she came out here. Whatever, she didn't care. If they thought she was messed up because that guy then they were dumb. They didn't know what she actually had in mind for the jerk. He got lucky.

Starr figured that she should probably speak before this girl would think she didn't talk at all. "My name is Starr." She said. She wasn't trying to make this girl go away or anything. She wasn't good at making friends. She never had been. Random people had always ran up to her and given her hugs. But they always said Corinne and Starr had no idea who Corinne was. But she just would walk away and not say anything. She had to hold in her anger from people always mistaking her for this other girl who obviously liked to be touched. That was the total opposite of Starr. She hated anyone close enough to touch her and it took all of her strength not to push people's hands away from her and tell them to leave her the hell alone.

"You look very cheerful. Why are locked up here?" She asked looking straight ahead. Starr didn't want to make eye contact with this Gwen girl. It might mean that she will have to deal with this girl all the time. She sighed, she was trying to be open minded about this friend thing. But right now it was so hard to even concentrate when she felt like she was never going to get out of here. She didn't want to die in this piece of shit insane asylum. She didn't need to be here as long as nobody messed with her. Just leave her alone and you won't get hurt. That was all you had to do. But many people obviously couldn't just let her be. They had to interfere and that wasn't going to happen with Starr.

((Sorry it took so long. Things have gotten so crazy!! <3))

[GWENYTH"ECHO"WHITE]

"Hi Starr," Gwen said with a smile, copying the girl's tone and posture again. She had always been called a copy cat as a child, but it wasn't like it was her fault, she couldn't help it. It was like a tic, a quirk. Gwen didn't realize she was doing it half the time, and when she did, she didn't realize it was bad or wrong or strange. It was normal for her, she didn't know anything else.

A breeze blew through her blonde hair and she cracked a little smile, grabbing a real flower from a nearby tree---she hadn't even realized so many were actually in bloom. She hadn't needed to bother with all her fake ones. But that was okay. Now there were even more flowers to look at, colored ones and brown leaf ones. Yes, Starr was right about her being happy, there was just so much good in the world. Good people, sunshine and flowers, glitter and smiles, laughter and hugs..... You had to grab what you could get and hold onto it for dear life. Sometimes even her happiness was faked, but it was worth it. Someone would benefit from your smile. If you thought happy, you could be happy. That was the only way to make it work. At least, it was as far as she knew.

"Oh, you know, a reason," Gwen replied to her question. Enter mental problem number two. She couldn't answer questions correctly, it would always be off, or make only slight sense. You couldn't learn anything about her by simply asking, you had to command: "tell me about..." whatever it happened to be. Gwen knew this frustrated some people, but again, it was beyond her control and understanding.

[CORINNE MAYES]

Starr watched her pick a flower. Why was she so happy? This place literally sucked. Why would she be so happy in an insane asylum. Maybe that was her problem. People thought she was psycho because she was always so happy about everything. Starr could not imagine her life like that. She, herself, had always been quiet and not wanting to talk to a lot of people. But the nurses and staff here knew Starr as someone who was not good with other kids, or people for that matter. Starr wasn't a nice person, plain and simple.

Starr turned back when the girl answered her. Well, it wasn't really an answer. She really just said the obvious. 'Great, what did I get myself into now.' She thought to herself. Starr raised her eyebrow at the girl. She didn't really care why this girl was here, but hey if people saw her at least trying to make conversation with someone maybe it would help her case. Starr slumped back against the bench. She had been sitting quite straight up but now it was time to slump back and get comfortable. This might take awhile.

"And that reason would be?" She asked who had been copying her position almost to the exact detail. Starr had to admit that she was getting interested in this girl. She smiled a lot, but her posture was the exact image of Starr's. Was she meaning to do that? Or was she really just unconsciously mimicking Starr. She almost grunted at the thought of making friends with someone so impressionable. Maybe someday it could be to her advantage to befriend such a soul, but right now she didn't feel like she needed any friends in here.

Starr patiently waited for the girls' response when she realized that she hadn't really taken a good look at her surroundings when she walked out and sat down. She had looked, but hadn't taken in where she really was. It was a garden with flowers that were blooming. It was pretty, but not Starr's thing. Her black hair moved slightly with a breeze that came through the garden. It just made her want to go back to the hell they call school. She could graduate and call it good. Maybe she would even attempt college. Just maybe.

Starr couldn't help her wandering eyes or her wandering thoughts. She wanted to roam this building and wreak some havoc on some unsuspecting workers. But she knew that would only make her have to be here longer. Not exactly what she wanted to do with her oh so valuable time. 'Ha, my time is hardly valuable.' She thought grimly to herself. What was she thinking, her mother didn't want to have to associate with a daughter who almost killed some punk kid at school. Her image was better than that. Even though she had just as many problems.

[GWENYTH"ECHO"WHITE]

"I have some 'screws loose'." She said breaking her position to make the air quotes. That was what people always used to tell her, she was a pretty girl, a bright girl, she just had a few screw loose. She couldn't answer any questions. That was her big problem. People used to tell her to just grow up. So many thought she was faking it, that she was trying it. But after enough research they realized it was not an act, but Gwen's reality.

Gwen noticed that Starr's position had changed, and so she changed hers too. Looking around at the flowers. "Isn't nature beautiful?" She mused. Gwen always trying to be optimistic, she couldn't afford to be sad, because she'd never come back. If she gave up being happy at everything, she knew she'd never let herself live--she'd be like a child, distraught, and would only cry until she couldn't breathe any longer.

Gwen sighed a little and closed her eyes, her smile turning into a line as she thought about being sad. She was basically friendless, she just was friendly to everyone she met, because she had no family to speak of, no one who cared or missed her. She figured it was better to be one sided and happy than have all her emotions. Being sad or angry hurt to much. So she had pushed them away.

She was just starting to feel more and more like a window, a piece of glass--transparent and easily shattered. Gwen shook her head lightly, her blonde hair shaking around her and she opened her wide eyes again. "I'm glad its spring." She mused again, dropping words to float in the air, not necessarily to be answered or commented one. Just to fill the silence.

[CORINNE MAYES]

Starr watched her movements carefully. Air quotes around what she was saying about having some screws loose. Wasn't that what was wrong with everyone here? We all just had a few screws lose. It seemed like the girl was not answering questions directly, more just beating around the bush. Starr wondered if that had something to do with it, or if she was just trying to annoy her. Starr almost didn't want to know. But she was getting very curious about this girl. "Don't we all have a few screws loose." She said smiling a little bit.

She was slightly annoyed that this girl wasn't answering her questions but she was trying very hard to keep her cool with her. Starr had to take a deep breath and count to ten before she started to tell the girl to just answer the question. But the girl's next statement caught her a little off guard. She had completely changed the subject in a matter of half-seconds. What was going on it that girls' head to make her not answer questions and to change the subject just randomly in the conversation.

"It can be." Starr wanted to mess with her, but she also wanted everyone to see that she was actually trying to make friends and not want to kill everyone who tried to talk to her. She could pretend well enough to get her by. That was all Starr needed, then maybe she could go home. She really hoped to go home. She wanted to find that guy who had pissed her off and finish what she started. He deserved everything that happened to him and now here Starr was, in an insane asylum. Starr sighed to herself. 'I don't find that to be very fair.'

She looked back at the girl. "Do you not like answering questions. Or can you answer questions?' She asked looking at the girl. There wasn't much emotion on her face, but there might look like her caring somewhere in there. It was true that she was curious, but that was all. Curiosity. 'Curiosity killed the cat right? Well I am the cat that will fight back.' She thought to herself. She wasn't really scared of this girl, only scared of being here for the rest of her life. That would not be so good.